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nonultrajoy

by ther

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1.
little bug 02:34
little bug, do you need a hug? i know that look and what yr always afraid of: a low hum coming from everyone you had three friends at this party and it looks like they went home standing like a ladder propped up by a doorway fearful of what happens after -- you could step outside to thank the host a short trip to the grocery store by the bar to pick up a couple basics on a government card you grabbed a large sweet potato it was smellin kinda smokey so you put with the coffe don't you look at me like that just because it is behind you doesn't mean it's in the past you grabbed a large yellow onion
2.
you felt it crawlin under yr skin you burned it off the clothes yr livin in the laundromat is only down the street think of all the people that you could meet there was an angel born on cherry street it only happens twice a century we took a train to see if it was true the pigs were out in force but we were too abc, cnn, and other acronyms came to her side she saw the state of the street and opened her mouth to speak: "what a bad sign, the devil take these eyes of mine"
3.
i'd never 01:13
i cannot believe what has happened to me since you moved out I'm feelin good n wellunderstoodatleastforthemost paaaart but there is a weakness that resides close to my soul when i stay inside when i don't leave my home and live on my phone what i read in scripture once made me figure i'd never believe in what makes the world go beyond what i know and what i can see but i think im beginning to understand what it looks like when God would extende Her hand so I drink with my friends in the park and pray in the dark
4.
some days there is a reason to get up and go to sleep others are much harder when the bottom feels so deep and some will give you thinkings you will never understand but i know that i'll be somehow fine as long as you're my friend when winter comes a creeping there are reasons to feel joy you can wrap around a pillow like a child's favorite toy the heat will be much cheaper if we sleep in the same bed and I feel far less like dying every time you kiss my head who's in love when you were only four months old yo tumbled down the stairs you were driven to the doctor, I had never felt so scared you had just broken you're clavicle because your bones were soft had you landed at a different angle, I would feel so lost I wonder if our father is still weighted down with guilt from the failure of a baby gate he didn't even build he briefly turned his back so he could flip the bedroom light but you were bound for exploration and the dream of taking flight who's your bud you are my bud we dancing to count basie in my parents' living room I can feel your arms around my neck and clearly hear the tune it was haunted, it was heavy, it was blowing in the breeze it was signing of a season in a place I'll never see

about

cassettes courtesy of Deep Sea Records
available at deepsearecords(dot)limitedrun(dot)com

credits

released March 15, 2019

all instruments and parts written and played by heather jones except

drums on tracks 2-4 by prudence deliliah

bg vox on...
track 1 by veronica magner
track 2 by doug dulgarian
track 3 by madeline rafter
track 4 by tabitha ahnert

recorded and mixed by heather jones at so big auditory
sobig.tk
mastered by elaine rasnake of daughterboard audio

moral support/inspiration credit to doug, amelia, orion, timm. alyssa, v, and alex

artwork by timm jones
cassette layout by tabitha ahnert

license

all rights reserved

tags

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ther Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

the breaking of the world-cocoon

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